Ground 331: New Fields, Whitburn and Cleadon FC

Hello again, reader.  It's been a while.  In case you'd been wondering, since I last wrote anything on here I've shivered through the death throes of Dnipro Dnipropetrovsk, watched an unlikely promotion lift-off at Desna Chernahiv's Yuri Gagarin Stadium almost aborted by Arsenal Kyiv, looked on as Whitley Bay lost at Stockton Town, South Shields won at Whitby,  Hercules Alicante stalled at home to Levante's B team, and Rayo Vallecano went down to Getafe on a balmy Sunday lunchtime in Madrid.  Apologies to all but one of the home teams listed; I can only promise not to come back soon.

I've also accidentally taken in the reopening of Belarus's national stadium as Dynamo Minsk hosted Derry City in the early rounds of the Europa League, sat through Ukraine U16s besting Belgium - a rare home win - at Kyiv's House of Football, and ended two years in Eastern Europe with a Brexit-beating move to the North Atlantic, tanning myself at three grounds on La Gomera:  a promotion play-off that Playa Santiago lost on penalty kicks, an island derby at Santa Reyes where the opposition turned up off the ferry with just nine men, and CD Tenerife's youth team's routine thrashing of UD Alajero as the latter finished rock bottom of the sixth-tier 1a Regional Grupo 2.  Oh, the glamour of it all.  Eleven new grounds in just over two years; in school report parlance, I could definitely do better.

Which is one of the reasons I'm at groundhoppers' dream club Whitburn and Cleadon this afternoon. Since my last visit in 2016, they've joined up with a junior football team, changed their name, shifted to a fourth different home ground, and been promoted to the middle-tier of the Northern Football Alliance after a six-season stay in Division Two.  "The move to New Fields settled us," reckoned manager Ryan Shave. "Having a pitch we know is in decent condition and looked after is important...in previous seasons we were asking players to help put up nets and barriers while watching us pick up dog crap off the pitch".  Whatever else they suffered, that was something they never had to dirty their hands with while dropping through the leagues at the Dnipro Arena.

Shave's team sit third with seven games gone, already 15 points ahead of a Felling Magpies side who've played six, lost six and conceded 42 goals while they were at it. The visitors are out and working on their shape in more than one sense of the word when I arrive at New Fields.  "A perfectly normal clump of grassland, with a hedge on one side and a school on the other,"  the Telegraph's Jonathan Liew wrote in a piece on South Tyneside Council's plans to sell it off in 2016.  With the local area not yet safe from the housebuilders, the 'Keep Cleadon Green' flags are still flying outside the brick clubhouse building the home team are emerging from. I find myself a spot where I won't be expected to chase down stray balls, eventually settling on a place where the visiting subs can retrieve any overhit passes and the home keeper beats me to the weeds behind his goal.  "Howay lads, someone grab this," referee Keith Scoffham says, holding linesman's flags out to both teams.  I take a headcount of nine other spectators, including a bloke with sunglasses and a camera bag he never opens, two people out for a walk and a visiting fan with his own folding chair.

The Magpies hold their own until the quarter hour, when their keeper scuffs a clearance and a Whitburn forward walks the ball around him and into the net.  "Eeeh, Jesus Christ," a defender rages.  "From our own mistake again." "Keep the shape, keep the shape," a midfielder tells his teammates.  "You're doing well," says Scoffham.  "Great half, lads.  Great discipline.  Thank you."  At half-time the teams form circles on the touchline, the referee stands alone with a water bottle and a defender has a slash behind the goal.  "At least he turned his back," a player laughs.  "You won't be coming on as a sub this half, will you?" Scoffham asks one of his assistants before restarting the game.

The second 45 is dominated by the home team, who see a header nudged back off the line and a shot that just fails to squeeze between the keeper's knees before they finally clank a second goal in off the bar.  "Dig in!" shout the Felling coaches.  "Keep going, heads up."  The away side battle gamely but the closest they get to a goal is a penalty shout that Scoffham waves away.  "Blatant ref, man," a midfielder complains. "Come on, lads.  Sometimes I get them right, sometimes I get them wrong. Do you want to moan or play?"  With ten minutes left, Whitburn dink a third goal in and go first in the table ahead of Hexham, Red Row Welfare and Blyth Spartans Reserves.  "Our first clean sheet of the season. Eight games in and we somehow sit top of the league despite not hitting any form," they tweet at full time.  Football, eh?

Date:  September 7th 2019
Admission:  Free